Hayden Merkel

St. Anthony of Padua, Morris, IN

I am Hayden Merkel. I hail from a small farming community in Indiana called Batesville. Although I grew up in Batesville, I went to college out of state in Missouri, Texas, and Ohio. I graduated in 2015 with a B.S. in Biological Sciences – Applied Physiology from Wright State University in Fairborn, Ohio intending to attend medical school. As you can tell, I am now running to become a different kind of physician.

Where/When did your sense of call develop?
Initially, I heard the call my junior year of high school through God’s loud communication and through his word specifically in 1 Timothy 4:11-16:
Command and teach these things. Let no one have contempt for your youth, but set an example for those who believe, in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity. Until I arrive, attend to the reading, exhortation, and teaching. Do not neglect the gift you have, which was conferred on you through the prophetic word with the imposition of hands of the presbyterate. Be diligent in these matters, be absorbed in them, so that your progress may be evident to everyone. Attend to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in both tasks, for by doing so you will save both yourself and those who listen to you.

I avoided the call all while giving my yes in smaller, subtle ways. It was not until after three years of being a FOCUS, Fellowship of Catholic University Students, missionary at Loras College that I decided to heed the call.

Often throughout life, I fell into lies and traps such as “I am not worthy”, “I am too sinful”, or “I doubt that I can be a priest”. However, when God calls us, he does not make mistakes, nor will he abandon us. In answering my call, I know I am in seminary because God has called me to be a priest. While in seminary, I am working to set up the habits, developing greater divine intimacy, and garnering a fuller understanding of the mysteries of the faith in order to be the best pastor and father I can be according to God’s Will. I am in seminary to prepare for the most joyous vocation God has set in place for my life.

The marriage I am pursuing is not to one woman, but to the whole Church. It might seem daunting to ensure no soul is to be overlooked or disregarded; however, this daunting task to be another Christ to all is also a source of mission and joy.

Who were/are your biggest influencers?
The greatest influences in my life, which have led me to this point, are Eucharistic Adoration, the saints, faithful Catholics and holy families. These four have opened up my heart enough for me to embrace God’s call. God uses the broken to make beautiful.

What advice would you give other men who are discerning their call?
If you feel a call, be not afraid! Act! You may have fallen into the lies I believed like feeling unworthy, too sinful, doubtful that you can do it, or inhibited in some other way due to relationships, but know that God sees you not for your deficiencies and strengths, but as His son. The Father will walk with you. From my own experience, pushing it off will only make things more difficult. The tug upon the heart does not go away because our hearts long for good, for our own good, the good of others, and for God. Have no fear for God believes in you. What if you said yes?